Determination? Check!

Exams are starting on Saturday. I'm stressed out yet I am trying my best not to. Not because I am not supposed to.. it's just that I know very well when I'm stressed, I freak out. This can be noticed by me trying to distract myself with something else. I could be eating, gossiping or even writing, like now. I get so scared of the thought of having exams that I'm afraid to start studying in the real sense of the word.

How do I get over it? Well by trying to remind myself that I know what I am doing, that I can fool whoever but I can't fool "me". I can lie and then realize that I'd start believing the lie myself then it'll be one huge lie that I'd fall for.

Funny thing is, I know myself more than anyone does and I'm the only one who could either destroy or win over myself.

I need to work and focus with everything that I can to ace these things people like to call "finals" just so they could scare the hell out of us. As if the realisation that what we'll go through is not enough for us to understand that it's what determines our grades. As if being called ol' plain "exams" wouldn't make us grasp the stress period we'll get in so they just named it "Finals"

Alright! Bring it on! I have my pens and brain ready.

Goodbyes & New Beginnings

Today was the last day of school for grade 12. Our class was next to theirs and we are the only two classes that spent most of the breaks or free times together. We treated them as friends, we invited them to our parties and just yesterday we threw a surprise party for them, bringing cakes, drinks and deserts. We had to ask their homeroom teacher to call them in and the moment they entered, we all screamed 'Surprise' and that's when everyone broke into tears, crying and hugging each other. We then celebrated and had the time of our lives during the next four lessons.

Today, however, they invited us for Pizza in their class and soon the bell rang announcing the end of the day. They all started crying, more than yesterday and the atmosphere was so overwhelming that I couldn't help but think of how is it going to be when it is my turn to say goodbye. Would I cry? Would it be hard to part with my 9-years-long friends? I know it will but looking on the brighter side, it would mean getting what I have always wanted and that is to finish with school once and for all.

Tomorrow, and for the rest of the remaining days of this year, 12th graders won't be there. We'd miss chatting with them, laughing around and most importantly, their presence. But it gives me great joy knowing that they're going to a whole new world, the real world of adults and the responsibility that comes with it. And I honestly and wholeheartedly cannot wait for my turn.

Dear Someone...

Dear Someone,

You've been ruining my life ever since I was 6. Sure, it was fun playing around with you, even I can admit that but sometime later dealing with you just became very hard. I've thought a lot about killing you, destroying you but knowing that I don't have the power to, I couldn't. You started possessing my mind and thoughts ever since I realized I was doomed. You're the first thing I think of in the morning. Not because I love you, no, the amount of hate I have towards you is so much bigger that I can't see others when you're in line.

When you're around, I become very weak. My mind goes off to different places all at once just by feeling your presence. I've avoided all those who were related to you for the fear of being reminded of you as with them your odor filled in, your scent that changed the whole atmosphere for me. A lot have urged me to change my attitude; maybe then you'd soften up a bit. Maybe, they said, I'd fall in love with you just like others have.

Know that I've tried, more than you'd ever know but I've been failing repeatedly. You've never captured my heart. I tried to admit you in, keep a place for you, hoping that someday, somewhere you'd finally belong there. Above all, you should know that I did all of this not because I wanted to, on the contrary, because I had to. There was no other way to survive than admitting you're a part of me; an essential one at that.

You confuse me to bits. I can’t think straight without messing up big time. You shatter my self-confidence into a tiny, million pieces. When asked about you, my heart beats a billion times per second that I could feel it bursting out of my chest. Even though I might not know everything about you, I feel like a total idiot when speaking about you. Your problems puzzle me, your words are unfathomable. Reading your expressions is as hard as a dyslexic reading a first grade textbook.

I could go on and on about the things that irritates me about you but I’m afraid the ink would rip this letter and you wouldn’t get to read what I wrote above. It saddens me that we’d never gotten on terms before but I’d like to keep it that way. God only knows how I’d end up if you’re going to spend the rest of my life with me.

One last thing dear Math: I hate you with a passion.

Not yours truly,
Kitten.

Snippets

Exams..
You'd probably noticed the little amount of posts I wrote on October but that's due to the super busy schedule I'm following and with everything else going on currently, I hardly ever find the time to read. Even though I had quit reading in order to memorize Quran verses, I missed it and I guess that it's a part of my everyday life that I could at least asses few minutes to.

First term exams have started on Wednesday, starting with Social Studies and today was English Lit. Since it's been two years since I last studied S.S, I was somewhat nervous on taking it so I double-studied (if that's even a word) and thankfully, it wasn't all that hard at all. It's also the first time that we take English Lit so I didn't really know what to expect and I know I've done well.

Firsts..

Beside school, I got my very first phone on 13th of October (Too late? I know). I've never felt the need to have a phone even though it's the 'trend' around here. My parents have always urged me to but I didn't need it. And on 6th of October, The Week crew came to school to award us (the winner team in Cubscribe Challenge) and I got a Samsung Corby and I'm very pleased with it. Plus, we got a one-year subscription for Muscat Daily and the other publications of Apex Stuff. Also, a group picture of us was published on the cover page of the paper.

After writing for Oman Observer for almost 6 months, they thought to let me work officially and sign my very first work contract with them. It's a huge commitment, I know, but I had made sure to know what I was getting myself into before going for the signing.

So that's it for now, and up until a new post, take care.

Summer 2010

This is the last day of summer 2010. I worked, read, played, watched movies, read some more, traveled, fasted Ramadhan, enjoyed Eid, spent my eidiyah and most of all, met my uncle and cousins for the first time in 3 years.

In every summer, I try to achieve as much as constructive things as possible and in this particular one, I've bought and read more books than I thought I would. Putting the good memories aside, school's starting tomorrow and like every year, the only motive that keeps me going is that if it I went, I'll be getting it over with.

Eid was great too and more than that. I wish if I could sit here all day and get my heart out about what happened but I have to write for my column, get some things straight and be ready to face tomorrow. Even though I'm not one to be attached with friends, my good friend moved out already and I'm afraid I'm going to miss her epically.

Other than that, wait for the upcoming chapters of Hiatus Lane which I've scribbled down during Eid holiday and after polishing them up, they'll be up on here soon. Ciao for now.

Let Us Talk This Over

When a certain person comes over and claims that you have done this or that, you would either start to fight back or keep quiet and take full responsibility for something that you have never done or simply say sorry to cool the person's nerves. After all, you get to pick which attitude to take, although, you can't exactly handle the rage building up in the mad person yelling for no reason.

I was extremely shocked of a teacher, shouting at the top of her lungs on a student for a silly reason that she, alone, wasn't so sure of yet. After shutting the door behind her, the teacher stormed off, leaving a useless threat on the clueless student who had just

The student, who is a classmate of mine, was bewildered. The other teacher who was present at the time at class looked rather speechless and astonished. I couldn't help but wonder about his thoughts, if this is enough for him to assume that all Arabs are lacking the element of understanding and talking things out and perhaps my assumption was actually right.

I've noticed from my personal experience, how ignorant some of us can be when being in such situations. We sometimes talk nonsense when we are supposed to be listening to others point of view, in the first place.

Islam taught us to treat others the way we like to be treated or even better. So, an understanding should have been there between the two parties.

Listen to the other story then tell your own if we are all willing to grow in an educated society, and not to forget, to set a good example for the next generation based on good communication between one another.

Busy March

Guess what? Today is the official day of my last mock examination (not technically because there’s the ICT practical test tomorrow but I don’t usually count it as one). That being said, the next big worry is acing IGCSEs which is on May-June.

After being prepared for almost 2 months for this examination, what I desperately need is a few weeks of relaxation and taking my mind out of school and the hectic days I go through. And no, this can never be the case since there’s one month to be all set for IGCSEs after having finished the syllabus. We all have to wait and start revising from now on because (as everybody's aware of), it’s not any exam, alas, an international one. Pray for me, readers.

On the bright side, this is a very busy week for me. There’s tomorrow’s final exam, and Tuesday, which is the deadline of the photography competition (that has no theme whatsoever and that makes it all the more harder to choose) and….

.....The long awaited ferry trip (the ferry below, to be exact)

Thanks to BOMU for arranging this event, 1st Youth Summit participant are all invited. If I was allowed to go, I would meet up with the friends I made while attending the workshops back in December and the awarding ceremony in February.

Profession wise, I am working with a team of my own choice in building up a story for TheWeek’s Cubscribe challenge (finding Sultanate’s best journalist), and the deadline is on March, 25th. Besides, there’s the Journalism Workshop on March, 16th at Muscat International school in order to get some tips and get the work done easily.

As a treat, I am currently downloading Spore and Half Life 2 to play later. Are there any good video games you recommend for a noob like me?

After boring you for so long about my days, what are you guys up to lately?

For now, enjoy the rest of your day!

Random Snaps

I haven’t updated this place for a week now and it feels like ages. It’s time for a new post even though I have nothing to write about except that I haven’t been getting some peace of mind because of the overload school work. Still, I have managed to spare me a few minutes of sneaking out in the afternoon and taking some snaps, plus, editing them, for the first time.

I shall leave you to enjoy.

Hypocrisy Or Ignorance?

According to our school, or to most of Omanis, the paranoia of using a daily sanitizer and the other health applications were restricted in the few first weeks of the conspiracy that is H1N1.

To know about all the applications they used to be crazed about, read my previous post in the month of September.

After exactly a week since school started, they no longer apply hand sanitizer on the students’ palms like they used to, there’s no mopping-the-tables-regularly routine, nor ‘the applying essence’ part (Luban, to be exact) to kill bacteria’s in the air, and most of all, they now allow us to go on breaks and even form a group in the corridors.

If this isn’t called hypocrisy, then I don’t what is. That or the ignorant mentality we simply seem to notice. I even got the guts and asked a teacher at school, and it went something like this,

Kitty: Umm, so, there’s no risk of catching the Swine Flu, is there?
Teacher: Why would you say such thing?
Kitty: Hmm, I don’t know, maybe because things changed and they no longer apply the daily routines they used to on the first days of school?

Oh-uh, she’d said that after spreading awareness, their job was over. But excuse me when I say, you were just pleasing and shutting up parent’s big mouths by being over-protective about the whole thing just to give the impression you so much wanted to give.

Is it just me, or the same thing applies to all Omanis out here? Prove me wrong if you can, but I still think it’s all because of our mentality and ignorance.

Assessment’s week

This week’s been all about assessments, hell load of school work and house chores.

This week’s assessments,
Saturday: Bio.
Monday: Math.
Tuesday: English.

I did fine in Bio and English, but I’ve missed some marks in Math’s. No harm done though, I still have a second chance on next week’s.

Next week’s assessments,
Sunday: Islamic, Arabic & Math.
Tuesday: Physics.
Wednesday: Bio.

And supposedly Chemistry on Saturday but I finally got the confirmation letter about dropping it once and for all. If you were wondering about the teacher’s response, well, let’s just say she’s taking it so hard,

Chemistry’s teacher: kitten, so you’ll drop it, huh?
Kitty: Yes *a big grin*
Teacher: But you’re capable of…
Kitty: I know, but I don’t like it *flashes a smile*
Teacher: Hmm, is it because of me, then? Errm, what can I do to…?
Kitty: No, it’s not you. It’s just that I don’t like Chemistry. *emphasizing the last word*
Teacher: Okay, but I think you can…
Kitty: I’m planning to study English Literature, and it DOESN’T require Chemistry *planning to run away*
Teacher: Okay…
Kitty: Yeah. *runs away*

See? She thinks this is the end of the world. But it freaking ISN’T!

Enjoy your weekend.

Not taking Chemistry this year!

Ever since I told my Chemistry’s teacher that I’m going to drop Chemistry, she’s been begging me to change my mind saying ‘it’s easy, don’t worry’ I don’t freaking like it, let me be, woman! Seriously, now that I’ve got to choose, I think she should shut up about her lectures on changing my mind, because guess what? I won’t!

At today’s lessons, she kept nudging me and saying ‘pay attention; you might change your mind' when I was scribbling down the notes, and to be honest here, attentive for the first time this year. I’m not supposed to be sitting there, nor am I forced to pay attention, but I was, by my own will.

Enough about that, the other thing: we’ve been separated to two classes depending on those who are taking ‘Extended’ level and ‘Core’ in IGCSE. And kitty's been assigned to do the ‘Extended’. Hallelujah. I’m thinking of taking 'Core' in Math though, since numbers is not my thing, to begin with.

Bio’s class was interesting today, mostly a continuation of Human’s kidney: Transplant. On the same topic, he also mentioned about ‘Stem cells’ and here’s what I go to know through Wiki;

Stem cells are cells found in most, if not all, multi-cellular organisms.They are characterized by the ability to renew themselves through mitoticcell division and differentiating into a diverse range of specialized celltypes.

Amazing isn’t it?

And for the zillionth time: I’m not taking chemistry this year, whether you like it or not.

Too too too much

The picture speaks for it self,



Even though they clearly 'care' about our own health, why risk it for the studying sake when you won't when it comes to going out for breaks?

Back to the drama!

Ditched school from the first day, fortunately, I got the whole scoop from a friend of mine telling me I've been assigned to do the 'extended' level, the first thing I said was 'what's the difference..?'. Apparently, the 'extended' is more detailed than the 'core', or that's what I've came to understand.

Swine Flu ain't a joke to the peeps at school, a hand sanitizer would be applied on your hands at the gate, later on, desks would get moped up with special kind of dettol or something similar, then comes the Doc who checks your temperature, last but not the least, they'll apply essence (bu5oor) all around the classes. Exaggerating now, are we?

Other than that, new teachers would be teaching us this year. Kenians & Indians, mostly. Oh well, another year to get through.