A Draft [1]

A draft of a new story I started with yesterday.

Comments are welcomed, and criticism is appreciated.

Shapes kept swirling and speaking in a language she couldn’t fathom. She tried approaching them, thinking that’ll do, and it did. Her mom was crying her eyes out and just close by were her little siblings, weeping, and wondering about their mother’s weird behavior. ‘Why’s mommy crying?’ the youngest one of them asked Linda with looks filled with anxiety. Linda opened her mouth, wanted to utter a word, but she knew she couldn’t, so she just shut it. Watching her steps, she hurried to her mom and soon enough, she understood the whole thing. The words repeated themselves in her mind, various images that haunted her memory showed up in a perfectly clear picture; their new life. She couldn’t help but feel hatred she’d always knew would form after this towards her dad, her friend whom she trusted and loved. She’d been right all along. That one day, the feelings she always had for him would surely change. If it wasn’t back then, then it defiantly will now. Again, she felt the rush of emotions overwhelming her; insecure, lost and loneliness. Linda tried her best to shrug the past off, the past that’ll no longer come back. She had to force those ideas away, but a girl can dream, right? She thought sheepishly.

The annoying voice echoed through her room like it did every single morning. She woke up thanking God that it was a dream, and as always, feeling cranky as hell. Washing her face, she looked up at her own reflection, seeing her face for the first time in days. She wondered about the amount of kilos she might have lost, but thought it didn’t really make much of a difference anymore.

The atmosphere was as suffocating as ever, but she decided she couldn’t care less, or that’s what she thought anyway. Walking down the staircase, her mom looked up on her daughter looking rather pale and absent-minded.

I shouldn’t interfere. It’s none of my business after all. I’m just a kid; would this make me achieve something? No, I guess I should just come off it already. It’ll bring nothing to me but trouble and depression. The same thoughts swirled in her mind as she began dressing up and getting ready for the big day, the day that’d decide which path her life would take.


Inspired by a dream of my own.
Thanks for reading.

Chapter- 2
Chapter- 3

When Boredom Stikes...

Before

After

I realize the retard-ness of the letter 'y' but that's better than the 'e' & 'n' I would have made. Time taken: 12 minutes, fa'9iya? I know.

Another Eid

‘Mamma,ileyoum el3eed?’ (1) were the first words I heard on the morning of Eid, ‘aiwa, beser3a elibes eldishdasha, abook yente’9rak barra3’ (2) my mom answered my little brother’s silly question.

I remember feeling very cranky and too lazy to wake up on my own, so I waited to hear any knocks on the door. Minutes later, I jumped off of my bed reluctantly and hurried to my parent’s room where I saw my little sister dressing up. She smiled at my shyly. ‘3eeeeedkuuuuuum emabareeek..wain 3ediyati?’(3) I repeated what I usually said on every past Eids, ‘roo7i tejahzi, 7abeebti’ (4) my mom said, I nodded and started getting ready.

After about an hour, we were at granny’s having breakfast together, and that’s when my uncle called from NZ. ‘Shoof i5wanak wo a5awatik kelhom jalseen yef6arro, wo inta ma heni. Eshtagnalkom abooy’ (5) my granny’s voice trailed off behind her sobs. I was glad that I finally had the chance to hear their voices for the second time in two years.

We got our Eidiyas and had lunch then headed to my granny’s (Dad’s part of the family). I then took a glance towards my grandpa’s room, and had to remind myself that he’s gone, and this was the first Eid we’ll have to celebrate without him. The room looked empty, literally.

My Eid ended when we all sat together and had our dinner and returned back home at eleven last night.

Hope ya'll enjoyed yours, as well.


Trans:
Eid = Muslims celebrate it twice a year.
(1) Mom, today's eid?
(2) Yes, now get going, your dad's waiting in the car for you.
(3) Happy Eid, where's my eid's money?
(4) Get ready, sweetheart.
(5) Everyone's having breakfast together without you, we've missed you.

When's Eid?

Whenever my younger siblings used to ask me during Ramadhan ‘Kitten, mitta el3eed?’, I used to answer ‘Youm elethnain, 8oolo amen into bs’, and somehow, it turned out to be ture, that tomorrow, Monday, is the first day of Eid, and the first day of the month of Shawal.

Thanks to my mom, half of the things were all set before Ramadhan, I still needed to go to the saloon, and its where I spent most of yesterday. I regret forgetting my book at the car (The Kite Runner, to be exact). Hours passed by till my sister and I took our turn.

We came home pretty late last night, but I’m glad we were done before the night of Eid, since I had loads to do. One of the things I need to re-check is recharging the Camera, on second thought; I still haven’t bought a new card memory. Oh well, other than this, all was well.

Kel 3am wo intu b5air wo 3asakum min el3aydeen, inshallah. (Eid Mubarak)


P.s I want Eideiyah in return ;)

To-read list

* The Goblet Of Fire ~ Done.

* The Order Of The Phoenix ~ Done.

* Half-Blood Prince ~ Done.
* Deathly Hollows ~ Done.

* The Zahir

* The Valkyries,

* The Witch Of Portobello

* Brida ~ 1/2 Done.

- by Paulo Coelho.

* Shanghai Baby ~ 1/2 Done.

* Marrying Buddha (A sequel)

- by Wei Hui.

* A Thousand Splendid Suns ~ Done.

* The Kite Runner ~ Done.

- by Khalid Hosseini.

*Einstein, The Life And Times -by Ronald W.Clark.

*Everyone Worth Knowing - by Lauren Weisberger.

*The Davinci Code by Dan Brown.

* The Rules Of Survival by Nancy Werlin.

* Size Doesn't Matter by Meg Cabot ~ 1/2 Done.

* A Company Of Swans by Eva Ibbotson ~ 1/3 Done.

* The Devil Wears Prada ~ Currently reading and 1/2 Done.

* The Cell ~ Currently reading

* Everything's Eventual.

* Hearts In Atlantis.

- by Stephen King.

Perspective

Warning: If you're ready to read an old scribble written down by a 14 years old girl when she was utterly bored, then go on, if not, pass the post. Wa 8ad a3thara man anthar [I’m excused]

Ignore the typos and the grammatical mistakes, I'm too lazy to edit things I've written once upon a time.

------------

Perspective

My life wasn't the same since that accident two years ago; I realized that not just my life that wasn't the same. But everything around me kept changing in a pace that I can barely keep up with. I understood that being free is just not that exact meaning which everyone was looking for.


It kept me unsure, un confident and insecure to know that I'm free rather than just being alone. Those two past years of my life was not what I expected they will be. It was far beyond my expectations: to live with no parents. Some of my dolphin friends enjoyed being left out and being able to swim with no restriction- just free from everything.

I can't lie by saying there is no enjoyment or fun in swimming freely, but knowing that there is no one there to watch after you, especially your mom who is waiting anxiously for your return or your dad who is willing to teach you new things on life and give you his secret life tips. There is no comparison to this feeling. The feeling which I lost just before two years, that no longer exists in my heart anymore.

Two years ago, I was as always discovering the deep spot near our living place. It was as any other usual day. The water was calm blue, with no rough waves or hard winds. Everything calm was all about this day. But out of nowhere everyone was alarmed that the hunters were coming close by our living place. That everyone started hiding and running away to save their lives. I too, was aware that it's the dolphin season to hunt – to track down us with no merciful heart and separate us from our family and beloved ones. It was not the same to the humans up there. Who are waiting to catch us and train us for their own benefit.

I've always considered humans the biggest danger and enemy, because honestly the other big fishes here in this ocean, understands our circumstance, but they have to do what they are meant to be doing. To be feeding on us. There is no harm in this – to take our lives for a good and convincing purpose. According to what human uses us for, is simply not that convenience. To trade our normal life here in where we belong in the first place, to fulfill their enjoyment and entertain their selves - by putting us in some kind of a small water spot, not even small as a river might be. What is the good reason in this now?

I consider myself as a victim of this situation as to what had happened two years ago. When those humans took my parents away and used them on some kind of a fish show. Which we're absolutely not – but why do they even care about this anyway. It's us that lives are ruined in as many possible ways as the word means. If they just think of us as fishes. Well, if I had the chance to face anyone of them and tell them we're just as mammal as they are.

I went on with my life in these two years without a conscious mind, as a dead body, living with an empty head. That's what I felt: To live with no purpose, to wander around aimless.

At some point in my limitless journey in wandering around the sea, I realized that there is absolutely no point in this life that I've chosen to live – or someone else had chosen to me. Anyway, I knew deep down inside my heart that it's not the smart way to deal with it: To be aimless. And that's totally not what my parents would want my life to be, if they just had a choice, which in this case they hadn't.

Through my first couple of months since my parents took-away. Hiding seemed to be my only solution. As I kept hiding- hiding from reality and trying to convince myself that there is hope if I just had faith, which I had but no longer exists. As the other feelings that just started fading away with every single wave in the surface of the water. Faking - was my second solution. To fake that everything was just fine and someday everything is going to be just the – normal. It also didn't do any good to me. It was like a whale trying to fake that her husband didn’t die, and then the last thing she knew, was seeing herself lying in some beach with every single human on this earth watching her.It took one year to understand that grieving was not the solution here, but to face reality as it is, and to enjoy every moment if what is left in my life. And surprisingly it worked.

Journeys and discovering was the only way to make me busy and contain me – in both ways: physically and mentally. Through them, I made new, wonderful and awesome friends. Who did their best not to mention their parents in front of me as my parent loss myself, I think it was kind and generous of them to do so. Riley, Karen and Anna were the best of friends I would ever ask for. All I knew was that, they were with me through my rough times and endured me when I was hysterical- as to hide or run away.

Now, I've decided to move from this place, where every single rock of the ocean reminds me of my loving mom and dad. It's not that I don't want to remember them. It's just hard to know that I would no longer be seeing them- very hard.

On my way now towards my unknown direction, I can see everyone wandering around happily knowing that they have somewhere to go. Not like what I am doing at this very exact moment: wandering around with nowhere to go. All I want is to belong. To feel that there is purpose of living what is left of my life which seems to be an endless life that I've gone through all by myself. For me, it's like I am never really living until I find something to die for. But the thing is: I have nothing to look up to, care for or at least in this case, die for.

Thanks for reading.

Too too too much

The picture speaks for it self,



Even though they clearly 'care' about our own health, why risk it for the studying sake when you won't when it comes to going out for breaks?

Back to the drama!

Ditched school from the first day, fortunately, I got the whole scoop from a friend of mine telling me I've been assigned to do the 'extended' level, the first thing I said was 'what's the difference..?'. Apparently, the 'extended' is more detailed than the 'core', or that's what I've came to understand.

Swine Flu ain't a joke to the peeps at school, a hand sanitizer would be applied on your hands at the gate, later on, desks would get moped up with special kind of dettol or something similar, then comes the Doc who checks your temperature, last but not the least, they'll apply essence (bu5oor) all around the classes. Exaggerating now, are we?

Other than that, new teachers would be teaching us this year. Kenians & Indians, mostly. Oh well, another year to get through.