Shattered Hope [Finale]

Something so important that he could not text it…

Curiosity crept its way through me, making the wait unbearable. I never wished for anything so badly as much as I wished for owning some sort of magical ability of reading minds at these pregnant seconds.

'Hello' his deep voice echoed through my ears when I picked up the phone immediately after the first ring. It showed how desperate I am and I could not care less about it.

'Hey, what is it?' a yet clear demonstration of my anxiety though there are other thoughts that raced their way to my mind, taking control of all my senses.

'I…' He could not hide his hesitation either, and the doubts I had moments ago became crystal clear in front of me. 'I want you to be honest with me…do you really remember me from school?'

'Yes, I do' I answered, blindly.

'I know it was ages ago, as I also know that this might sound ridiculous but I do not give a damn…' he said it so fast that it sounded as though he was struggling for air, 'is there anything you want to tell me?'

'What!' I could not form the words or take control of anything that my mouth uttered, 'I mean, no, you said you had something to say', even though I was clearly stalling and lying, I hoped I was not that transparent and at the same time I reminded myself of how bad of a liar I was.

'Maria,' he breathed into the phone, sounding frustrated and I hated it. 'I know what I said…But, you did not answer my question yet' I could predict how his face might have looked like; eyebrows ceased, looking more curious than hopeless.

I sighed heavily, leaving him hanging in there and said after few seconds, 'yes, and it is not of highly importance than what you are going to say'.

He weighed his chances then said, 'I doubt it. Go on, I'm listening'.

'Just say it'.

'Okay,' he made up his mind and I was stupid enough to continue the conversation. 'You know back at school, I had a crush on you,'

Mohammed had a crush on me! ME!

'And... 'He wanted to finish, but I saved him only to realize that I've pushed myself into further troubles, 'I did too'.

Why, Maria, why!

My mouth acted before my brain, 'We were teenagers back then, Mohammed'.

'Ha-ha' he let out a nervous laughter and I joined him, and for a couple of seconds, it was just me and him on our own, laughing at our haunting past.

'When I first met you,' Mohammed said and my brain stopped functioning, 'Those feelings' he was finding the right words, 'sort of…came back'.

The world suddenly dissolved, containing me within it. Salty water streamed down my eyes and it was then that I knew I was crying. I walked to my room and hid beneath the duvet, not caring whether he was waiting for a reply or not.

I was speechless.

'Maria,' he said, and I opened my eyes and ears ready to hear what he had to say because I did not have what it took to reply.

'Aren't you going to say anything?' I had kept him waiting for one solid minute but what do I have to say?

'Listen', he continued, 'I don't expect you to have the same feelings. Just say something'.

'No, you listen to me!' I sobbed. It was the first time in my entire life to cry in the presence of someone other than my own self.

'You cannot just come up and say that!'

Why am I being so defensive?

'What we had before was nothing, and that was when you thought I was nothing'. I sobbed even harder, 'Were you even aware of my existence?'

'Please…' he pleaded, 'do not cry'.

'You cannot tell me what I am supposed to do' I snapped back.

'I'm not supposed to, yes, but I cannot bear the fact that you are crying because of me. I am not worthy of you....' he trailed on.

'I had a crush on you for four years', I said out of the blue, 'I do not expect you to know that'.

'I did too, Maria, I really did,' He confessed, 'but you had made sure that none knew any means of contacting you. How did you expect me to get to know you?'

He wanted to say something. I could not wait any more, 'Yes…' I urged him.

'And…' he said finally, 'and now that I did, I want us to start over'

'Mohammed, we were teenagers and I do not think that that was anything. It was just a crush' I said, wiping away my tears and sounding serious.

'You said it. I do not know about you, but there were some feelings left for me, and when I saw you again, I fell in love with you'.

This is not fantasy, wake up: He loves you.

'I love you, Maria', he finished, and my head spun around.

'Please tell me what I want to hear,' He pleaded again, 'Please…'

'Stop' I said it to the world, to myself, and to Mohammed, because I wanted things to be right when I said this, 'I have always loved you'.

'But,' I was not done yet, 'There are no second chances in love. Thanks for everything, Mohammed'

Click!

And that was the last time I ever talked to him again.

[Shattered Hope: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4]

---------------------------------------------

A/N: A friend of mine was surprised that I had actually included some sort of romance in a story, as she thinks that I don't 'believe' in this kind of things.

To make it clear for all of you, as every other piece of writings I've written, a dream inspired me to write this one too. The characters were all there and their emotions were portrayed, which made it rather easier for me to scribble them down and add a bit of my own take on it.

Thanks to everyone who followed Maria's story, and as you have read, she did not believe in second chances in love just as I don't like happy endings.

P.S I had lots of fun writing it; insisting on staying at my cousin's place because that's where ideas hit me, waking up at 2 AM to note the first few lines of every chapter, finding the right black-and-white pictures, not to mention, the constant excitement of wanting to know what would happen at the end, because Mohammed did seem to be a nice guy, don't you girls agree?