Shattered Hope [2]

7:30. it’s time.

Purple always looked good on me, I assured myself.
I wore a purple empire-waist top with black jeans, and then eyed my reflection. Should I add accessories?

I entered the kitchen, took the chocolate cupcakes bouquet and placed it on a plate, trying to make it look as homemade as possible.

On the way to the door, I ran back to my room, snatched my handbag and took a final glance at my face. I looked so damn happy.

Outside, the sky was starless, not a single spark illuminated the dark night. Walking quickly past the two buildings, I stopped to a halt on the doorway of the third one. I read his address card again,

Third floor, Apartment no. 38

After taking control of my breath and steadying my heartbeats as I chose to climb the stairs, I ringed the bell.

No answer. Maybe they have changed their minds. But why didn’t he inform me? Perhaps hating to sound rude? Though this is beyond rudeness, if you ask me...

Click. Someone removed the metal chain of the door, and it swung open, and I started feeling dizzy already.

‘Hello, you must be Maria’ the most lovely-looking women said, welcoming me in. It’s running in their genes; good looks.

‘Yes, and you’re Mohammed’s sister.’ It was more of a statement than a question, ‘Please,’ she gestured for me to take a seat, ‘Call me Rania’.

‘Rania....’ I mumbled, ‘you have a nice name.’

‘Thank you’ she positioned herself next to me, and said, ‘I’m glad you could join us tonight, I was not sure you would actually. I know how it feels like, visiting us for the first time and all’

We are surely going to be best friends, I dreamed on.

‘No, not at all’, I lied, ‘we are a family now....’ Why did it sound so cheesy?

‘Exactly,’ she nodded with a gentle smile, ‘I’ll check something out and come back, make yourself at home’.

My eyes wandered the living room, starting from its paintings to its decorations, it all looked…cozy, like home; just as she said. Where was he? I wondered for the first time. My thoughts were caught up with giving a good first impression and maintaining my cool that I did not have the time to think of him.

'Mohammed was on the phone right now,' Rania said while taking her seat again, 'he would not be able to make it tonight. He's required to stay for another discussion even though it's quiet late' she stared at her watch for a second or two as an anxious mother.

'I see…' Why today of all days? I wanted to cry out loud.

Remembering what I had in hand, I placed the plate of cupcakes on the table. She thanked me and we started organizing the table for dinner. We laughed, talked about stupid childhood memories as though we shared the same ones, like good old friends do.
One hour and a half was all it took for me to get used to Rania, her unique and wonderful personality was amusing, and she sure had a bit of her brother's sense of humor.

We hugged good-night and I went back to my apartment, not knowing whether to regret or appreciate Mohammed's absence for tonight.

By the time I reached home, disappointment washed over me.

He was supposed to be there…

I felt betrayed, and the weather was not helping so I tucked under the blanket, fighting to keep my eyes open for a reason I did not know.

Toot...toot...toot...toot...

A far away voice yet it felt near pulled me out of my dream and blurred my vision until I heard it perfectly clear.

TOOT TOOT!

It was my phone. I fought my way to it and snatched it open. The message was from Mohammed…who's Mohammed? Oh, YES!

Through my obscured vision, I read:

Sorry 4 the disturbance, but I wanted 2 apologize. I couldn't skip the discussion lesson.

It was 9:45 and I must have dozed off for a good 30 minutes.

- Don't worry. Rania and I had a great time together.

- Sounds promising, she feels the same way too. I know it might sound weird but did I scare u off with this whole invitation thing from the 1st time?

- I thought it was nice of you to do so, really.

- I'm glad u think so :) one more thing, did I wake up u or something? What was I thinking, texting this late, anyways? =/

I thought of lying, but I could not.

- Well actually, you did, but I need to thank you for doing so, I had plans for something else.

- Haha. Sorry again. What kind of plans if u don't mind me asking?

- Watching TV..I think I should seriously work on switching it more often.

- U r not a TV person...hmm. Have fun.

- Yeah, good night.

- Night :)

Watching TV, for god's sake?! What's wrong with me?

I did watch TV eventually because I could not sleep that night and the weirdest idea came to my mind: I should tell him, and as scared as I was from confronting him, I forced myself to sleep at last.

Days passed by consecutively in a frightening pattern. I could not build up the courage to say what my mind tells me to. Mohammed and I became good friends after that night, we'd text each other every single day and sometimes he would call to recommend a good movie and we would watch it together, commenting on the silliest details through text messages.

It was easy that way, I told myself.

God only knows what I might say to end up embarrassing myself because I cannot be myself with him around. My anxiety and nervousness grew by the day and I decided to let the confrontation idea pass.

We are good now. There is absolutely no need to bring it up.

Rania and I hanged out as much as best friends do, or as close sisters do. We did our shopping together; went to the movies, or just whenever we felt like going out and having a girls'-only time. She worked nearby my University so we met twice a day, not to mention the constant chit-chatting on the phone.

She was the sister I never had.

[Shattered Hope: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4]